Time Names Mitt Romney Man of the Year 1912

[calimac]

NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—In an extraordinary gesture of recognition for a losing Presidential nominee, Time magazine today named former Massachusetts Governor Mitt Romney Man of the Year 1912.

In a press release explaining its decision, Time’s editorial board wrote, “Even though his quest for the Presidency was unsuccessful, Mr. Romney’s ideas about foreign policy, taxation, wealth inequality, and women’s rights typified the year 1912 as no one else has.”

In giving Mr. Romney the nod, Time said that he beat out such other candidates for Man of the Year 1912 as Tsar Nicholas II of Russia, Kaiser Wilhelm II of Germany, and Edward Smith, captain of the Titanic.

“It was very close between Romney and the Titanic guy, but we gave it to Romney because it took him slightly longer to sink,” Time wrote.

Mr. Romney could not be reached for comment, a spokesman said, because he was travelling around the world visiting his money.

-- The Borowitz Report

Comments

[whswhs.livejournal.com]

Of course, had Time really been around in 1912, their Man of the Year would likely have been Woodrow Wilson, one of the key figures in bringing progressivism into the American mainstream (along with Theodore Roosevelt and Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.). Though, to be sure, many of Romney's policies were, by today's standards, significantly to the left of Wilson's.

[steepholm.livejournal.com]

Excellent! I saw Capt. Smith's memorial statue in Lichfield, recently. Apparently it's there because his home town, Hanley, didn't want it when it was first made, and Lichfield took the statue in. Now, of course, Hanley has changed its mind, but Lichfield won't give him back.

[randy-byers.livejournal.com]

I love it!