merry non-Christmas
Dec. 20th, 2010 09:40 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
calimacI've been seeing more than the usual amount of commentary this year about non-Christians and how they do, or do not, and should, or should not, celebrate Christmas.
In my childhood, my parents took the course - which some would now condemn them for, although I certainly wouldn't, and even more I wouldn't have at the time - of making a big child-centered holiday out of Hanukkah. We understood that it was not a major holiday; we didn't confuse it with Christmas; we groaned whenever anyone called Hanukkah "the Jewish Christmas" or when the chocolate Maccabee soldiers proved, when the foil wrapping had been removed, to have been made in Santa-shaped molds (this actually happened); but we did make a festive occasion out of lighting the candles, and we did have presents. Lots and lots of presents. Each of the four children had one present for each night, carefully calibrated to increase in importance temporally and be even cross-temporally, and there were general "family" presents too, all carefully labeled and heaped up on a big table in the living room. This was a huge occasion, outstripping even birthdays, and stretching it out over eight nights made it even more fun.
But there was no nonsense about a "Hanukkah bush" or anything like that. I was in my teens before I discovered that some professing Jews had Christmas trees, and I was shocked to learn it, I don't mind telling you. We could get presents, sure, but a tree was Christian, never mind that tradition's questionable origins. To me, the whole point of being Jewish was not to be Christian. In fact, I thought we were blessed to have a whole calendar stuffed full of holidays. If Yom Kippur was kind of dire for a child, we had Sukkot and Simchat Torah and Hanukkah and Purim and Pesach, all of which were lots of fun, along with obscurer holidays like Tu Bishvat and Lag B'Omer (I was never quite sure what that last one was for), whereas Christians, I thought, only had Christmas and Easter. (I was genuinely clueless as to what those mysterious indications on calendars reading "Ash Wednesday" and "Palm Sunday" meant.)
After graduating from the present-getting years, I just kept my head down during Christmas season, trying to keep out of the way of the unavoidableness of it (Liane felt a stir behind him, a breath of air. At his elbow a voice said, "I am Christmas the Unavoidable."), the same way I kept my head down during Big Game weekends at college, which I was similarly uninterested in participating in.
You might think, with that attitude, that I'd have problems being married to a Christian, but no. I have no objection to Christians celebrating Christmas if they want to, and if they're dear to me I don't mind pitching in. (In much the same way that, having grown up with football-obsessed little brothers, I know a lot more about its rules and strategy, and of the gridiron exploits of that long-gone era, than you'd guess from my otherwise life-long lack of interest in the subject.) So my responsibilities each Christmas are to set up (and, later, take down) the artificial tree so that B. may decorate it, to take her out looking at light displays, to contribute and receive some presents, to do our share of cooking for the family gathering, and to join in on the day. So now I live in a house with a Christmas tree and some decorations, but I think even my puritanical younger self would understand if I said that's because it's a Christian's house too.
So there we are. I've even learned to like some carols, another thing I once never thought would happen. I think it was when the Roches, one of my favorite pop-music groups, put out an album of carols 20 years ago that was the turning point for me. Here they are singing some good ones very well. Just to be even more inclusive, here are two other carols I particularly like, done by others: my favorite version of "We Three Kings" and what I consider a surprisingly good "Little Drummer Boy", a carol that, although it's done often, apparently nobody likes except me. Always marching to a different drummer boy, I am.
In my childhood, my parents took the course - which some would now condemn them for, although I certainly wouldn't, and even more I wouldn't have at the time - of making a big child-centered holiday out of Hanukkah. We understood that it was not a major holiday; we didn't confuse it with Christmas; we groaned whenever anyone called Hanukkah "the Jewish Christmas" or when the chocolate Maccabee soldiers proved, when the foil wrapping had been removed, to have been made in Santa-shaped molds (this actually happened); but we did make a festive occasion out of lighting the candles, and we did have presents. Lots and lots of presents. Each of the four children had one present for each night, carefully calibrated to increase in importance temporally and be even cross-temporally, and there were general "family" presents too, all carefully labeled and heaped up on a big table in the living room. This was a huge occasion, outstripping even birthdays, and stretching it out over eight nights made it even more fun.
But there was no nonsense about a "Hanukkah bush" or anything like that. I was in my teens before I discovered that some professing Jews had Christmas trees, and I was shocked to learn it, I don't mind telling you. We could get presents, sure, but a tree was Christian, never mind that tradition's questionable origins. To me, the whole point of being Jewish was not to be Christian. In fact, I thought we were blessed to have a whole calendar stuffed full of holidays. If Yom Kippur was kind of dire for a child, we had Sukkot and Simchat Torah and Hanukkah and Purim and Pesach, all of which were lots of fun, along with obscurer holidays like Tu Bishvat and Lag B'Omer (I was never quite sure what that last one was for), whereas Christians, I thought, only had Christmas and Easter. (I was genuinely clueless as to what those mysterious indications on calendars reading "Ash Wednesday" and "Palm Sunday" meant.)
After graduating from the present-getting years, I just kept my head down during Christmas season, trying to keep out of the way of the unavoidableness of it (Liane felt a stir behind him, a breath of air. At his elbow a voice said, "I am Christmas the Unavoidable."), the same way I kept my head down during Big Game weekends at college, which I was similarly uninterested in participating in.
You might think, with that attitude, that I'd have problems being married to a Christian, but no. I have no objection to Christians celebrating Christmas if they want to, and if they're dear to me I don't mind pitching in. (In much the same way that, having grown up with football-obsessed little brothers, I know a lot more about its rules and strategy, and of the gridiron exploits of that long-gone era, than you'd guess from my otherwise life-long lack of interest in the subject.) So my responsibilities each Christmas are to set up (and, later, take down) the artificial tree so that B. may decorate it, to take her out looking at light displays, to contribute and receive some presents, to do our share of cooking for the family gathering, and to join in on the day. So now I live in a house with a Christmas tree and some decorations, but I think even my puritanical younger self would understand if I said that's because it's a Christian's house too.
So there we are. I've even learned to like some carols, another thing I once never thought would happen. I think it was when the Roches, one of my favorite pop-music groups, put out an album of carols 20 years ago that was the turning point for me. Here they are singing some good ones very well. Just to be even more inclusive, here are two other carols I particularly like, done by others: my favorite version of "We Three Kings" and what I consider a surprisingly good "Little Drummer Boy", a carol that, although it's done often, apparently nobody likes except me. Always marching to a different drummer boy, I am.
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no subject
Date: 2010-12-21 05:51 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-12-21 06:01 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-12-22 04:07 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-12-21 07:54 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-12-21 08:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-12-21 12:04 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-12-21 04:51 pm (UTC)Why is Christmas in December, anyway? Nothing in the Gospels says that; in fact, the implication is that Jesus was born elsewhen in the year. Many say the Christians appropriated the Roman Saturnalia. Even if that's true, it doesn't make Christmas any less Christian. Santa Claus, despite St. Nicholas, may be of pagan origin as well; again, that doesn't make him any less Christian now.
no subject
Date: 2010-12-21 04:42 pm (UTC)What cured me of hating it: the nifty version by Mannheim Steamroller, which has the interesting quality of beginning electronic and gradually becoming acoustic.
I still don't want to sing the low part, though.
no subject
Date: 2010-12-21 05:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-12-21 04:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-12-21 04:57 pm (UTC)I'm one of those who never cared much for "Little Drummer Boy." And I'm a drummer. Off the top of my head, I think the version I find most compelling is the one on Stevie Wonder's 1967 Christmas Album, "Someday at Christmas."
Ed Pierce