Fair enough, which is why, when commenting on sartorias's example, I kept pointing out that this was only two sentences. And it was not, in any case, as clear an example of the problem as this one was, which is why I linked to this one.
Agree that my sentence is ploddy. This is why I don't write fiction! Its only function is to convey the orienting material that would avoid tripping readers over cobblestones.
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Date: 2009-05-22 01:05 am (UTC)Agree that my sentence is ploddy. This is why I don't write fiction! Its only function is to convey the orienting material that would avoid tripping readers over cobblestones.